


re: That Thing

by greenbirds



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen, I live for snark, because science!, epistolary fic, what is this even
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 06:01:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5323202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenbirds/pseuds/greenbirds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being an exchange of emails between Dr. Meredith Rebecca McKay and Dr. Danielle Jackson.</p>
            </blockquote>





	re: That Thing

To: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: That thing  
\----------------------------------------------  
Dani: 

Are you positive that these are the best linguists in the field? Yes, I know Ancient is hard. You’ve told me. But watching them try to figure out what the thing even DOES is like watching someone try to translate Paradise Lost using A Child’s First Picture Dictionary. I am not shitting you.

I am surrounded by fucking idiots. Come back, and bring coffee (please?).

M.

#

 

To: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: That thing  
\----------------------------------------------  
Merry:

I’m afraid I’m stuck here dirtside for the nonce. I’d love to explain why, but it’s apparently a secret, which is stupid. Suffice it to say I’d much rather be there. Or anywhere else that’s a whole galaxy away from here, Jesus Christ. 

In the meantime, I’ve attached a report that may be helpful, outlining some of the more esoteric Ancient technical terms and metaphors. Give it to Dr. Peterson: he’s the most likely one of the bunch to understand it and put it to proper use.

Good luck!  
Dani

#

 

To: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: That thing  
\--------------------------------------------  
Dani:

I gave the report to Dr. Peterson as instructed. He and his staff have spent the last three days arguing over the meaning of two syllables. There is not enough /headdesk in the entire universe, swear to fucking God.

I’m all for just turning the thing on and seeing what happens. Zelenka and Peterson are worried it might blow up. I don’t see what the problem is.

Are you SURE you can’t come back?

M.

#

 

To: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: That thing  
\----------------------------------------------  
Merry:

I wouldn’t. As well you know, blowing up is hardly the worst thing that can happen with Ancient devices.

Gotta run. Another damn meeting.

Dani

#

 

To: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: That thing  
\---------------------------------------------  
Dani:

Fine, spoil all my fun.

M.

#

 

To: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: That thing  
\----------------------------------------------  
Merry:

You know it’s what I live for.

Dani.

#

To: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: That thing  
\---------------------------------------------  
Dani:

You’ll be ecstatic to know that the brain trust finally got it together enough to decide the device wasn’t dangerous. It only took a week. 

As it turns out, it was a lot of agita over a goddamn water purifier. Which, okay, it’s a (literally!) million times better than a Nanopure system, and the molecular biology folks are absolutely over the moon (I’d give you the technical details, which are kind of cool, but I know you: your eyes would just glaze over). Still: a fucking water purifier. How is this even my life?

Coffee. I need coffee if I’m going to put up with this. And chocolate.

M.  
#

 

To: Dr. Meredith McKay [mmckay@dsrt.gov]  
From: Dr. Danielle Jackson [djackson@dsrt.gov]  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: That thing  
\------------------------------------------------  
Merry:

Not sure where in the mission briefing it said that Atlantis was required to be exciting. Glad the thing didn’t blow up.

They have to let me out of these meetings someday, right? If you’re really nice to me, I’ll bring you that blend you like from Old Bisbee Roasters. But you have to be really nice. That shit’s expensive.

Dani

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this little piece back in 2011, at the request of Ivorygates. It was part of what inspired the monster that we now call "The Girl, the Gold Watch, and Everything."
> 
> @dsrt.gov is, of course, a reference to "Deep Space Radar Telemetry."


End file.
